I'm sure every one has been through this kind of night. But I don't know how many of them realize they're living it.
Have you ever felt you are being watched? Have you even sensed something that it's not apparently there?
It's like you're doing your normal stuff and suddenly it hits you. Opposition.
I'm not the kind of girl who writes stuff like this. But right now I want to.
In the church they tell us we are a spirit who has a soul and inhabits a body. Sometimes we like the body we inhabit, sometimes we don't.
And we pay a lot of attention and spend lots of money on our body and giving it as much pleasure as we can.
We also care too much about our soul. Everything has to do with how we feel, what we want, what we think... it's ok but... how often do we pay attention to the inner yearning that we all "feel" sometimes?
You don't get what I mean by the yearning word? Let me make myself clearer.
Have you ever looked at the sky and feel like you belong there?
Have you ever watched a beautifull sunrise and something inside you wants to sing?
Have you ever been afraid and don't know the reason?
This is my say, and you may not agree but I really think those 3 questions have to do more with who we are spiritually than with any other thing.
For many out there, my view, my perspective is pretty simplistic.
But for some, I am right.
It's cold here.
You know, these days have been tough for me. I had to face some things (areas) of me that I don't like and BE honest, first to myself. It's hard.
God knows. I know.
The truth is that right now I feel opposition. For some reason I think I'm special. I feel like the main character of my own novel. I feel like something BIG is going to happen to me and there is something that doesn't want that to happen.
I'm dealing with me. I don't want to lose my battles. I can't. I won't.
I know this reading is probably awkward for some. I'll continue to write it (later) to try to make sense. Although I think somethings in life are very difficult to understand or make sense of any of them.
Problably writing will help me to put everything in its place, or to come to terms.
Thank you for those (very few) who read my stuff. Yes, I'm a little bit weird. No, a big bit of weird.
And I write in bad English and Spanish and "Spanglish".
But it helps me. To find my answers.
I hope my writings could help you somehow to find your own.